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May. 11th, 2009 @ 11:10 pm BSG: Sorrows of Melody


Title: BSG: Sorrows of Melody
Author: [info]lobselvith8
Characters: Sharon Valerii
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: 2.18 “Downloaded”
Summary:  Sharon wonders who she is after Resurrection
Beta: [info]cytaylor

 

 

Sharon Valerii stood atop the rail of the building, looking out to the new world the Cylons were building atop the one they crushed into dust.
 
She remembered how simple life was when she was a pilot – a Raptor wrangler, laughing and playing triad, trying not to spooch her landings and making love to Galen Tyrol. That was a lifetime ago, before the bullet missed her brains and ripped through her cheek instead, before two bullets pierced through a man she loved as a father. It came crashing down around her every time she thought about her old life, when the pain seemed so unbearable all she could do was scream until nothing came out. She was a Cylon; she didn’t laugh anymore, she didn’t make jokes with her friends, she didn’t have anything – she was a lifeless husk of artificial flesh with hands stained in the bloods of billions.

Brown eyes flickered at the seven Cylons passing by on the path below, moving around and talking as if they were real people. Sharon studied the fallacious Cylons, wondering what surreptitious motives they had as they took the place of the people who once lived here, the men and women who were washed away by the fission bombs that obliterated them from the face of all twelve worlds.

She was a machine, artifically engineered and programmed, but she felt the cold of the wind, the scent of pine from the trees being planted, the sweat as it cascaded down her face. She should be an emotionally detached machine, but she still felt as human as she did two years ago when they first called her Boomer. She didn't understand why she felt this current of emotion wash over her. She couldn't remember any reality other than her life as Sharon Valerii, but she wasn't Sharon; that life was all a lie, nothing more than an echo of a life that still resonated in her.

The rage, the sorrow, and the pain still lingered deep inside her as she tried to bottle it up. Sharon wondered whether her faulty landings was a part of her that tried to resist what she had subconsciously known, that she was an evil machine who would wash humanity away in a flood of blood. She was obviously an imperfect, broken, irreparable machine.

A small part of her wished that she was like the thralls that paced back and forth mimicking human behavior, imitating the race they vocally claimed to despise with such fiery passion, disconnected from the human slaughter they caused. Their imitation seemed honed to an unnatural perfection, with Dorals chatting about the irrelevant while drinking coffee and Simons debating the medical and scientific theories. Sharon's eyes darted to the rest of the building complex as she witnessed Natalie and Sonja debating the morality of having the Centurions as servants and the D'annas talking in hushed whispers while eyeing her. Only the Cavils avoided this spectacle, preferring the solitude of their precise and calculated surroundings on the Basestars.

Rain started to fall from the vengeful clouds above, thundering fiercely as if the gods themselves had proclaimed their anger and dismay at the replicants who paraded in human flesh. The sunlight dimmed as the husks of dark wisps blotted out the sky while the Cylons huddled to safety, but Sharon remained. The rain fell from the dark heavens in its torrent of rage, but Sharon welcomed it; she let it wash over her, a multitude of tiny liquid drops bringing to surface the black-out she experienced on Galactica when her sleeper programming had taken over and the cracks began to ripple across her life.

Lightning lit the empyrean in a bright flash as her cheek twinged, recalling when her world came crashing down around her after the sleeper program took control and send two bullets spiraling into Adama's chest. She had been taken prisoner as her mind tried to grapple with what had transpired, having no recollection of what she had been told she'd done. Her mind flashed again to her interrogation, when Colonel Tigh had slapped her hard across the cheek where her suicide bullet missed. Sharon didn't defend herself from the assault, her only thought focused on the man she nearly killed, the man she thought of as her father, who was fighting for his life because she didn't succeed when she pulled the trigger in her mouth days prior.

Wisps of black hair across her face dripped with the rain that splattered against her body, her eyes narrowing to see the desolation that had supplanted the path below. Her mind flashed back to the myriad of people that once occupied this place, little children drawing on the ground with colored chalk while adults spoke to each other about a criss-cross of topics. The woman’s memory shifted as she pictured the house she had planned to build with Galen when their service was over, the home that was supposed to house their daughter and their dreams, now irrevocably shattered.

Sharon Valerii blinked, turning her gaze to the flooded path as some Cylons hurried by, oblivious to the thing now watching them, blind to the monster watching them. That's what Sharon Valerii was now, not a person, not a machine, but a monster lurking among machines that thought they were people. She was a soulless and evil monster, lurking in plain sight, clutching to a humanity that was all pretend.

About this Entry
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From:danniisupernova
Date:May 12th, 2009 03:44 am (UTC)
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Very dramatic. Your writing is coming along (your beta missed a few things)

I really like the ending.

Edited at 2009-05-12 03:45 am (UTC)
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From:lobselvith8
Date:May 13th, 2009 01:08 am (UTC)
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Thanks! I appreciate the kind words, dannisupernova. I haven't written in a while so I'm getting back into the swing of things. It's nice to hear my writing's getting better. I'm glad you enjoyed the end.
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From:grey_sw
Date:May 12th, 2009 04:23 am (UTC)
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Poor Boomer... she never did manage to be human or machine. I like this glimpse into her point-of-view during Downloaded -- wish they'd done more with her on the show.
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From:lobselvith8
Date:May 13th, 2009 01:22 am (UTC)
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I loved Downloaded - seeing Boomer's return, and getting insight into Cylon culture, made it one of my favorites. Boomer started off in a dark place, and the transition to hope was great, but she must have dealt with a lot of demons when she discovered she was a Cylon.

I wish they dealt with her more, too. Then again, it happened to other characters as well. Caprica's POV in Caprica-Tigh was non-existent (came out of nowhere and was dropped just as fast) while Cavil, Aaron, and especially Simon got no POV. Why did they side with Cavil? Did Cavil convince Aaron and Boomer convince Simon? Did they just know the truth because Cavil shared it with them after the war? It's an example of the problematic writing of the show, where the writers simply do not bother to explore plots if they don't want to, despite the need to explore such stories so that the plots make sense.
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From:grey_sw
Date:May 13th, 2009 02:06 am (UTC)
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Yeah, the Final Five and Cylon Civil War stories have plot holes you could drive a truck through. Starting with big questions like "why would Cavil even want Hera?" and "how did Cavil get rid of all the 'millions' of 2/6/8s offscreen?" and running all the way through small things like "do Simon and Doral know the whole story about the Five, or not? And if so, since when?"

I'd like to believe that The Plan will fill all this in, but I'm not real hopeful. We'll see, I guess.

Tyrol is another character who never really got dealt with -- he wibbles around randomly during season 4.5, with no obvious explanation or motivation, and then suddenly kills Tory and exiles himself. Huh? I thought he was supposed to be a rather important character! The difference between how he was treated in season 4.0 (where you can always tell how he feels) and season 4.5 (where his motivations are largely a mystery throughout) is really blatant. In fact, I think the whole idea of "motivation" got tossed aside during 4.5, in favor of having the characters do whatever was most convenient for the writers, whether it was in-character or not...
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From:lobselvith8
Date:May 13th, 2009 02:36 am (UTC)
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4.5 had some serious problems in its story. Hera's kidnapping didn't make any sense - the 145 are all males, after all. Did some Eights defected to join Boomer and the 168 faction, so pregnancy was possible now? Did Cavil think he'd reunite the 268s back, maybe? You'd think if Cavil brought back D'anna in The Hub, it meant that he knew the 268s were alive (and that he allowed some to live, or Boomer talked him into it).

The Cylon civil war loses its punch because we have no sense with Aaron and Simon why they're on the other side. Even Cavil's explanations kind of leave out how Tigh was de-aged with hair and Galen was a teenager on Basestars (he said he was working in as a knuckledagger since he was 18 years old). Cavil, Aaron and Simon thinking this meant the end of their civilization (going against the programming) makes sense, and Boomer (a character who painfully lost the fight against her programming in S1 when she shot Adama) certainly has context. Instead we got "all Cavil's fault" and Galen abandoning Nicholas and voting to leave the fleet that ignores the fact he was re-instated as Chief and is helping rescue the ship with Cylon tech.

Btw, did Tory even warrant a part in Cavil's alleged plan of revenge? He seemed to ignore her while he insinuated himself in Saul, Ellen, and Galen's lives.
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From:grey_sw
Date:May 13th, 2009 02:49 am (UTC)
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You'd think if Cavil brought back D'anna in The Hub, it meant that he knew the 268s were alive (and that he allowed some to live, or Boomer talked him into it).

I agree. To me, it seemed as if season 4.0 was originally meant to set up a Centurion rebellion and/or a Cylon schism with eventual reunification (as the Razor Hybrid's prophecy suggested). Cavil's behavior on the Hub makes plenty of sense in that light, but it doesn't when you consider season 4.5... then again, Cavil's behavior during 4.5 hardly makes any sense, mainly because the writers didn't bother to explain it.

Galen abandoning Nicholas

Yeah. Between this and Tory, Tyrol's behavior was pretty disgusting during 4.5. And let's not forget how eager he was to have a fantasy-child with fantasy-Boomer, while meanwhile the boy he raised from birth was going "where's Daddy and who is this weird pilot"!

Btw, did Tory even warrant a part in Cavil's alleged plan of revenge? He seemed to ignore her while he insinuated himself in Saul, Ellen, and Galen's lives.

I think this is something we might actually see in The Plan (I'm guessing we may even get a nice helping of How Cavil Made Tory Evil And Mean). Tory was a third-string character in season 3, when Cavil was supposed to be doing all his manipulation, so they'll probably want to fill in her backstory a bit in the movie...
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From:chamalla
Date:May 17th, 2009 01:19 pm (UTC)
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Beautiful story. I really enjoy all the stories about Boomer that are filling the gap left in the show. It helps understanding her character better and you write her so well. I could almost see her standing there in a storm.
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From:lobselvith8
Date:May 18th, 2009 12:37 am (UTC)
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Thank you, chamalla! I think Boomer is an excellent character, and the scenerio that she's an AI who dealt with living a life that has totally fabricated, her fate pre-destined, her existance as Sharon Valerii the sum of this fabricated life that served as the basis for who she is and the choices she made, and I'm sad to see the show didn't explore that. The root of Boomer resulted in another interesting theme of the show, the concept of evolving AI and the Cylons emulating and despising humanity in the same breath; it's a strange contradiction that I found fascinating.